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 Various : A pirate ship

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One day, a pirate ship is cruising the seas off the coast of England when the scout yells, "There's a English ship on the horizon." Immediately, the crew looks to the captain, who valiantly says, "Bring me my red shirt." The captain dons the shirt and the British ship commences the attack. The captain and his men fight valiantly and crush the British attackers.

A few days later, the scout yells, "There are three English ships on the horizon." Immediately, the crew looks to the captain, and again he says (in his most manly voice), "Bring me my red shirt."
Again, the English ships begin their attack and the pirates fight off all three of the attacking ships. After the battle is over, one of the mates sheepishly approaches the captain and asks, "Sir, why do you keep asking for your red shirt?"

The captain replies, "I ask for the red shirt so if I am injured in battle, you will not see my blood, and will continue to fight."

The crew is in awe with these words.
The following week, the scout yells, "There are ten English ships on the horizon." The crew again looks to the captain, waiting for him to ask for his red shirt. He is silent for a moment and then says, "Bring me my brown pants."

 

 

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